OUT THE DOOR TO WEST VIRGINIA

by Zach Smart


“One cup of coffee, then I'll go.”-Bob Marley

This is likely my last post before I undergo an abrupt location change. I’m embarking for Morgantown, W.V. tomorrow. No, seriously.....why not? My tolerance for northeast snobbery and northeast-bred, condescending individuals has waned, significantly, over the past few months. A rash and hasty decision it may be, but we all have to explore uncharted territory and discover a sanctuary away from home as well as the old stomping grounds at some point. Don’t we?

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I can probably think of 21 reasons to get the hell out of dodge and trek down to Morgantown tomorrow morning. Imagine that. 50 things to hope for before packing the necessities, clothing and furniture and UHAULing it down to some slapdash little apartment nestled in between two rival bars. It's actually a pretty simple decision, considering that (1) Bobby Huggins has fished out a revitalized recruiting class, one leaking with talent, that could eventually (2) bring the WVU fan base back to the Mike Gansey/Kevin Pittsnogle glory days, when the Mountaineers simply shot teams out of the gym. (3) Though Rich Rodriguez and John Beilein may have morphed the school into the Michigan pipeline and though the football and basketball teams may have lost a bit of their luster (see Alexander, Joe, who authored the March 2008 NCAA Tournament best-seller "Ten Game Tear") the new blood is certainly convincing. (4) The evolution of the spindly 6-foot-8 Kevin Jones, a versatile ringer from a potent, traditional New York basketball breeding ground (Mount Vernon H.S.) could open eyes. (5) Devin Ebanks is a high-rising hellraiser who will also put fans in the seats. Long + glossy-smooth + ultra athletic= major upside.

(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mv7gF22z7UI)

(6) Maybe, if the 'Eers buy into coach Huggins' (7) sophisticated hoop methods, we can expect a (8) media circus that doesn’t mention his DWI history in every article or column (9) and watch Huggins maneuver the big blue and yellow bus deep into the NCAA Tournament Pool. (10) If Alex Ruoff continues to scorch the nets, Joe Mazzula avoids encounters with the cops (while proving his sophomore season wasn't a one-game wonder) and the New York neophytes pan out, West Virginia could vault into a new area code this winter.

(11) Hopefully, the fans keep filing in decked out in home team paraphernalia, (12) posters like the one that Alexander recently designed (when he waited for UConn's Stanley Robinson in transition and quickly planted his face with a rim-ringing slam) keep printing, and (13) the house that Jerry West built continues to rock.

(14) Perhaps Mr. West can watch his son, Johnnie jack up the crowd's pulse (possibly blowing the roof off the gym) by popping off the pine and draining some threes when the South Floridas and Johnnies come to town. (15) With the University and the Morgantown community joining forces to create one of the wildest pack of diehards in collegiate athletics, the post-game festivities make even Joakim Noah and Bill Murray's after party regimen look soft. (16) All I ask is that you move my couch out of site when these festivities take place. Word around the campfire is the loyal WVU fans' affinity for setting couches ablaze in joyous celebration runs parallel to Eliot Spitzer's prostitute penchant. (17) That gives the fans more motivation and stimulates fanfare.

(18) The backyard brawl, one of the best and now evenly-matched rivalries in college hoops will be off the charts this year and (19) West Virginia will light up Las Vegas, where Mazzula and Cam Thoroughman will need to be held in check. It’s a good thing D’or “Nightlife” Fischer is no longer on the squad. Him and Vegas could never be a healthy combination.

(20) The Big East’s 18-game format permits teams to play each opponent once and three teams twice. Thus, the Mountaineers will play home-and-home games with Louisville, Pitt, and South Florida.

(21) Don’t let the non-conference schedule deceive you, the ‘Eers won’t be consuming any cupcakes this season. They’ve got games against Ohio State, Davidson, and Longwood, which features one of the most underrated players in college hoops in versatile 6-7 forward Kirk Williams. This makes for entertaining regular season life.

I’m out the door.